Sharing

Carrying the message in service and beyond

We buried a loving friend and a valuable asset to Narcotics Anonymous today. Our regional delegate passed away on 26 November 2005. His smile was magic. He performed the duties of his position with diligence and integrity. He had the ability to voice his opinion and let it go. I believe his ability came to him by living a program based in working the steps. There’s something about our friend’s spirit in life that touched everyone. There is also something about his spirit that touched people after his passing.

Our earthly paths come to a screeching halt upon hearing that a loved one has passed away. Time stands still. We are stripped of our mortal agendas such as occupations, places to be, and things to do. Yes, we need to have occupations and provide for the day, but when we buy into the lie that an occupation or financial status gives us greater importance than our fellows, we buy into spiritual death. We have the potential to pursue our occupations and titles while allowing the spirit of love to reach others.

This is the essence of service. Recovery, by way of the steps and service, affords us an opportunity to unlearn the lies that once worked. When we strip away all the misinformation and character defects, the spirit is the same in all of us. Without misleading language and self-centered motives, we can recognize the sameness about each other.

The people attending the funeral came from all walks of life—coworkers, family, friends, one of his college professors. Of course, the funeral was heavily seasoned with members of the fellowship. I was grateful to be a member of Narcotics Anonymous as I watched our fellowship wrap our friend’s parents in a warm blanket of comfort. It was overwhelming to watch the coming together of such diverse people because of this one person who existed in all these various circles. Those in attendance walked away changed. People outside of our fellowship realized that addicts do recover, and NA members walked away thinking non-addicts aren’t so different, either.

Let us now return to our regularly scheduled programs to carry the message that “no addict seeking recovery need die without a chance to find a better way of life.” (Basic Text, p. xiii) Thank you to our friend for his gift of bringing us together.

Greg B, California, USA

Responsible for my recovery

My name is Jose. I had been using for twelve years when my mother suffered a stroke and was taken to the hospital. I was using all kinds of substances and I knew I had a problem with drugs. A friend who had been clean eight months told me he thought I was an addict and that I needed help. He also told me about Narcotics Anonymous. I told him I wanted to attend the group because I needed help.

Those first few days, I was so scared. I didn’t know what was going to happen to me and I didn’t have much hope of staying clean. Everyone told me to keep coming back, that I had to change my way of thinking and acting. I was willing to ask for and receive help. I was told that, in this program, the only requirement for membership is the desire to stop using, and that the NA promise is that any addict who has the desire to stop using can achieve it.

I looked for a sponsor, I made friends, and I listened. They talked to me about how important it was for me to have a little faith so I could begin to believe. I got away from the places and the people who used drugs. The program was working for me. I was staying clean.

I found a sponsor in my group who taught me to learn to live as a human being and he helped me realize how much my life was changing. He told me I was not to blame for what had happened, but that I was responsible for my recovery. He asked me to smile and be grateful for my life. And then a miracle happened: I began to smile. The compulsion to use disappeared. I had very little faith, but it was enough. Each day I stayed clean, my faith got stronger.

After some months in recovery, my life began to change. I am a different person from the one I was before I attended meetings, all thanks to a higher power and the fact that I was not alone because I was with people like me who were also recovering.

Jose P, Jalisco, Mexico

How do we show our message?

Do you have a home group? Do you welcome the newcomer? Or do you sex and romance them? Do you work the traditions? Do you have a sponsor? Do you work the steps? Do you have a relationship with a higher power? What do you do for the newcomer? Do you go to meetings late, leave early, or spend half the meeting outside?

We are all role models for newcomers. They watch us like we watched the members who were here when we first got clean. At one meeting I had this experience. A member with six years clean comes to meetings once in a while. He arrives late, disrupting the meeting. After being there for about ten minutes, he goes outside for a cigarette, again disrupting the meeting. He stays outside and comes back in—just in time for the Serenity Prayer.

What message does this give to the newcomer? Some might think, “That guy arrives late and leaves early, which seems to work for him, so I might try that.”

Recovery starts with us, as individuals and as home groups. As individual members and as NA groups, we need to welcome newcomers, meet and greet them, introduce them to other group members, and make them feel at home. Some groups offer newcomers help finding sponsorship. Some groups take turns ringing that person, picking them up, and taking them to meetings. Maybe the newcomer just needs a meeting list with some group members’ phone numbers.

It is important to me to make my recovery a priority and arrive at meetings on time or before they start. Sharing our experience, strength, and hope is a great way to encourage newcomers. We have to remember our primary purpose: to carry the message to the addict who still suffers.

Neil D, Sydney, Australia

The inside message

It’s Wednesday evening. The chairs are in a wide circle. It is 7:27 pm and I’m watching the clock as it moves toward 7:30. That is when our meeting starts. I have never before felt this kind of excitement about being at a meeting, and I’ve been coming around, off and on, since 1993.

Many think, “NA in prison? I doubt the recovery is any good in there. ‘Real’ recovery starts when you make it back into society and live in the free world.” For me, that is far from the truth. There is great recovery in the institution I am temporarily visiting. For me, my recovery must start in here. I don’t want to be locked up with the mindset that other people and society-at-large are to blame for my circumstances, and that I don’t have any part in my disease. I have the disease of addiction. I am an addict. When I use drugs, I go to all extremes to use and I continue using with no thought of what any of the consequences may be.

My own attempts to stay clean never worked. My wife, my children, and my mother could not keep me clean. No human power can. The only way for me is by working this program the way it has been worked by countless others before me. I have to want it—and I do. Surrender had to come first, and right now is the perfect opportunity for me to build on my program. I could sit back and just wait until I am released before starting my recovery, but chances are that I would not then find it. I would not have begun to reap the rewards of surrendering, of seeing my powerlessness and unmanageability, or having a belief in a Higher Power to whom I turn my will and life over every day. To me, these are rewards because doing these things is showing me a better way to live.

The recovery we have in here is a gift from the God of our understanding. There are many inmates interested in recovery who are practicing this program to the best of their ability. We have two NA members who faithfully show up here every Wednesday evening to bring a meeting in to us. That kind of service shows the real meaning of the saying, “You can only keep what you have by giving it away.” For that I am forever grateful.

I have a sponsor with whom I talk frequently and with whom I work the steps. This is the first time in my many recovery attempts that I am honestly and intensively working the steps. In the past, I would not work them because I always believed my way would keep me clean, but it does not. Working and practicing the steps daily has become a new way of life for me. Recovery has started and is in my life behind these walls. The day will come when I am released from this place. When that day comes and I go on my way, I will have NA walking right along with me.

Mark Q, Pennsylvania, USA

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