Narcotics Anonymous and New Orleans are entwined in my heart. I first learned about NA in New Orleans in 1982. I was taken to a local neighborhood hospital after my third overdose and placed in the psychiatric ward there. (I don’t believe the hospital sustained too much damage from the recent hurricanes.) I was then transferred to another hospital for inpatient detox and rehabilitation. (Because that hospital sits on one of the highest points of the city, I don’t think it sustained much damage either.)

I attended my first NA meeting at this facility. That meeting changed my life forever. So has Hurricane Katrina which, along with Hurricane Rita, devastated the city in September 2005.

I used every day for fifteen years. Every day is a reason to celebrate in New Orleans, and I took full advantage of that. But after a year or so of active using, it was no longer a party for me. It became a nightmare, day in and day out. I couldn’t wake up. My disease clamped down on my spirit like a pit bull, shredding my sense of self-worth, mangling my will to live. At that first NA meeting, I saw life and tasted hope. I remember feeling such euphoria as the realization hit me that I didn’t have to live in despair any longer. I had a choice.

So, what is Narcotics Anonymous? NA is a bunch of addicts in recovery. We go to meetings to share with each other about how we stay clean. We come from every walk of life; you name it, NA has it! Rich, poor, black, white, brown, old, young, gay, straight, male, female, transgender, short, tall, fat, skinny, American, Hispanic, German, Indonesian, South African, Iranian—NA has it all. NA is hope. NA is freedom. NA is love and compassion and truth. NA has given this addict the ability to live a life without the use of drugs. NA has allowed me to rejoin the human race. After twenty-two years in recovery, I not only remember those precious memories from my childhood in New Orleans, but  I now have many new memories to hold near to my heart.

Because of NA, I am capable of sitting with this feeling of utter helplessness as I watch the city of my childhood drown. Because of NA, I can empathize with the anguish of losing one’s home. My family lost everything in Hurricane Betsy in 1965. Because of NA, I can be there for my best friend and aunt who still live there and who survived Hurricane Katrina. I can listen to their sobs, and cry with them. Because of NA, I don’t  have to run away from these overwhelming emotions, fearing that I’ll be consumed.  I am here, because of NA.

My experience is that some sponsees feel entirely satisfied if I work the steps with them, while others want more. Well, as I have been told, “It is okay to want.” Someone wanting something does not always mean that I can give it. Some want to hang out, some want to be best friends, some want to be my favorite, and others want relationship counseling.

It seems a cover-to-cover read prior to working the steps is problematic. With normal newcomer resistance and procrastination, this may delay First Step work too long and lead to relapse. On the other hand, waiting until someone is all the way through the steps before introducing them to this book could delay exposure to this important information for a year or more. This might lead to unnecessary misunderstandings and delay awakening to spiritual principles associated with sponsorship.

Here is what I am trying, but I would love to hear how other sponsors do this. When I get a new sponsee, I have him read Chapter One, “What Is Sponsorship?” While they read it, I ask them to highlight things they strongly agree with, things they strongly disagree with, and things they have questions about. Then we get together and go over what they have highlighted.

I request that my sponsees refrain from sponsoring others until they have begun their Ninth Step and have had some relief from their defects of character. Based on this, it seems that just prior to Step Eight would be a great time to review Chapter Three, “To the Sponsor.” While I considered waiting until after Step Eight, it seems unwise to delay someone who is ready to make amends from getting started.

Chapter Four, “The Sponsorship Relationship: Developing It and Sustaining It,” seems like a fertile source of meditation material, and if my sponsee has been working with others, this chapter answers questions that they may have. Now, if they are sponsoring someone with additional needs, or someone who relapsed, I would encourage them to read those sections of this chapter when they need it, rather than waiting until just before Step Eleven.

Chapter Five, “Sponsorship: An Ongoing Journey,” seems perfect for right after they finish the Twelfth Step for the first time. Right at the time they are reviewing their spiritual awakening and committing to carrying the message appears to be a wonderful time to look at some of the extended aspects of sponsorship.

When I was really new (not just kind of new like now), I called the NA helpline because I was living in a remote area, but close to the city. I detoxed in a friend’s trailer, in a very scenic area with woods and a lake. Bus service was very infrequent, and I used this as an excuse not to go and score when I had money.

The purpose of calling the helpline was to try to get a ride to a meeting. A guy picked me up after driving out of his way and we went to the meeting. He gave me his phone number, and then, after I had moved twice in two months, I called him again, and he took me to a different meeting that was two municipalities away. He told me it was a great group, so I went there with an expectation it would be fairly good. Up until then, my experience was that the meetings in my local area were quite unfriendly. I remember trying to reach out by talking to other addicts before meetings, during breaks, and after meetings; but I was completely ignored. It’s good for me to remember that, so I can be sure to make newcomers feel welcome.

We arrived at this meeting, and I couldn’t believe what was happening. Addicts were introducing themselves to me and making me feel like I really mattered. The next week the same guy took me to the same meeting, and I was amazed that addicts I met the week before remembered my name and made me feel welcome again. Needless to say, I made this my NA home group, and at the next meeting I asked a member with more than nine years clean to sponsor me. This meeting attracted addicts from far away, so there was quite a bit of clean time, and there was also a treatment center whose clients attended the meeting.

Our format was very uncontrolling, and we said very little about what you could or could not do during the meeting—it was great. Most meetings started with the chairperson asking the first person to open the meeting, and after that the meeting took on a life of its own. Addicts would just jump in without being called on or asked to share, which seemed to happen in a very orderly fashion with no control from the chairperson. Maybe a few times, two addicts would start to share at the same time, and one would let the other go first with no problem ever occurring.

Some nights there might have been some kids playing around while the meeting was going on, and it was no big deal. I even remember that one night a friend’s son went and sat on the chair in the middle of the circle, which we place there for the addict who is still suffering. The boy was swinging his legs and smiling; it was funny, to say the least. It was no big deal, and we didn’t have a bunch of ridiculous controlling rules, so we could focus on making others feel welcome and nurture an atmosphere of recovery.

As far as I can remember, this was my best experience of an atmosphere of recovery. How I miss those days at my old home group.

My name is Bonnie, and I am an addict from Africa. Last night we celebrated the NA birthday of one of the oldest members of our small NA community here. He is seven years clean. It was very emotional for me, especially because he and I have had differences in opinions. I was reminded of the love and concern that he so freely gave me in my numerous attempts at getting clean.

“What happened? Where is the love? How did I get so embroiled in differences of opinion and style that I forgot our primary purpose?”

These questions raced through my mind as we hugged. Not a word was uttered, but the evidence was in the firmness of the embrace and the handshake that accompanied it. In Higher Power’s good timing, we are drawing together.

We now have six meetings weekly, and we are hoping to start a Sunday meeting soon so that we will have a meeting each day of the week. At least four people attend each meeting. We do not know how big meetings feel; we only hear about them. We feel like a convention when we have more than fourteen members in a meeting! We are making progress.

I take this opportunity to welcome to our meetings all NA members traveling in this part of the world.